October 9

This week was hard on everybody because the dog is going to stay with Grandma Pookie and Papa Buzz for awhile, and they came to pick her up on Thursday.  (Though J. is much gentler with her than he was at first, he is still behaving inappropriately some of the time, and when I intervene to release the dog, he has been slapping or punching me–so the dog is going away until he has stopped slapping and punching for at least a month, and is willing to obey me on things related to other people and animals.)  But the change has made everybody emotional.

In addition, B. is heading out to Outdoor Lab next week, which we hope will be a good experience for him, but he doesn’t want to go, so he’s upset about all the preparations.  Plus, the rest of us will miss him, so that also makes people here a bit emotional.  Plus when we need to buy things for B., J. gets jealous.  I think he figures any love or money we spend on B. or K. leaves less for him.  That may be true for money, but not so much for love–but he doesn’t believe we’ll save any for him, I think.  Of course, B. and K. see that we’re spending lots of time and attention with J., and even getting him foods and things that we don’t usually get them–and though we explain that it’s because he is lacking so much and having such a hard time finding food that feels at all familiar, they also feel we’re showing extreme favoritism.  Everything is shifting for all of them, and they’re all pushing for more time with parents and more resources.

Which leaves the parents pretty exhausted.  And that reminds me, that we do need to get J. in school, and the school seems in no hurry to help us with that, so I need to get back on it.  (They say they want to help, but they’re being very, very slow about it.)

Still, when we look at where we are today compared to where we were two months ago, or even one month ago, we’re doing way, way better.

Good stuff:  J. asked for a hug yesterday.  We’ve been playing card games or hide and seek or foosball every day this week.  We started fishing.  (Haven’t caught any fish yet, which is very frustrating for the children.  Plus I’ve spent all my time untangling lines, which is less fun than actually fishing.)  There have been 2-3 times this week when J. has gotten very angry, but still managed that anger without resorting to violence.